Woman Praised for Blocking Man Who Paid $500 Dinner Bill: ‘Not Into Games’

A woman has been praised for immediately blocking a date after he paid the bill on their $500 dinner together.

In a post shared on Reddit eight days ago, the user u/GivemethatIwantitnow wrote about why she ended up ditching the man after their first date—despite the fact he paid for their meal.

“I was invited on a date and he asked me ‘what’s your favorite restaurant?’ My honest answer was ‘my favorite place is a bit much for a first date,’ but I did still tell him about it because, well, I thought he was cool and I truly love the place so I tell everyone about so they’ll go,” the poster wrote.

She also told him of some more reasonable places for their first date, but ultimately the man decided to book the expensive restaurant.

“We have apps. We have drinks. We have dinner. We have conversation. We have dessert. We have a good time (from my perspective). This means we ran up a serious bill,” the poster added. “Pay time comes. We do the check dance, sort of. I say ‘Oh separate checks.’ He also says separate checks (so cool, we’re on the same page).”

When the separate checks arrived, they both put their cards down and when he saw her card, she felt he was staring at it intently. “It’s not that I think he’s some numbers savant where he was stealing my info by looking at my card, and it wasn’t even his little comment of ‘Oh now I finally know your last name.’—which I of course wouldn’t tell him before—it was the game he played,” the poster wrote.

When the server came, her date gave her both bills and said he’d cover it all, frustrating both the server who had arranged separate checks and the woman.

Who foots the bill on a date is often a matter of debate, but despite paying for the meal, the man had still put his date off.

“I’m feeling like this was a s*** test to see if I would pony up to a $250+ each restaurant bill,” the poster wrote. “I felt like he was checking to see if I was a gold-digger or something, even though I’d literally told him we shouldn’t go there the first date.”

A s*** test is also referred to as a “congruence test” or “fitness test” in dating and is a common term used by dating advice and pickup artists. It refers to subtle challenges or teasing remarks made at the other person during the initial stages of dating to look for certain qualities or behaviors in the other person.

While sometimes these tests are harmless, other times they can take toxic forms, such as manipulative statements or “tests” to see how the other person responds.

Feeling like she had been unfairly tested over the bill, and a little put off by the man’s behavior, the poster left the date, said thank you, got in a cab and blocked him.

“I told one of my friends this story today laughing and they told me I was actually the villain in the story,” she added. “I’m just not into games.”

Therapist and life coach Lynn Anderton told Newsweek: “I think it says more about her than him that she’s blocked him. She may have felt uncomfortable, but she could have departed this situation more graciously.

“It seemed less about the bill and more about their reaction to paying it. They were trying to read each other and, even though they had a good time, they probably came away from what was seemingly a good night out with misconceptions,” Anderton added.

But in more than 6,400 comments on the post, people were on the side of the woman and criticized the man, despite the fact he picked up the bill.

“He s*** tested you. He saw that on YouTube,” commented Reddit user Sushi-Moon3.

Bekindalot wrote: “His vibe made you feel uncomfortable. His actions showed that he plays games and oversteps boundaries. It doesn’t sound like the right fit for you.”

“I don’t tolerate ‘tests’ in relationships,” posted 4channeling. “The manipulation never stops and there’s always another test.”

Newsweek reached out to u/GivemethatIwantitnow for comment. We were not able to verify the details of this story.

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